Trump Is Better Than Santa

He’s making a list, and he’s checking it twice. No, I’m not talking about that jolly old poster-child-for-morbid-obesity, Saint Nick. I’m talking about President Trump. His list is a little different than Santa’s. Santa compiles a list of children who are naughty and nice, the nice ones get presents, and the naughty ones get coal or something. The most fitting corollary in today’s current affairs would be Lindsey Vonn trash talking President Trump prior to her aborted efforts at the Winter Olympics. That’s a stocking full of coal if ever I’ve seen one.

President Trump’s list is different than Santa’s. You see, even if you’ve been naughty you’re going to wake up on Christmas morning to a pile of presents under your tree. The Trump Effect is upwards of seventy broken records on Wall Street, trillions of new wealth added to the economy, unemployment at historic lows, and so on. The prosperity is for everyone. It doesn’t matter if you trash talk the POTUS, the work he’s doing is for you too. What a time to be alive. Be as a big of an ass as you please, and you still get rewarded by the mere virtue of your status as an American.

Or be as naughty all you like. Slander the president all you like. Make a buffoon of yourself by crying incessantly about all the wonderful things he’s done that benefit you. He’s going to keep working for you whether you like it or not, and chances are you’re going to end up liking it. Check out your 401k. Do it. Right now. I’ll wait. Big and beautiful, isn’t it?

What has President Trump done? He’s kept his promises.

He said he’d get us out of the Trans-Pacific Partnership (TPP) and he did. He promised to remove us from the Paris Accords and he did that too. The wall is in its preliminary stages, and illegal immigration has plummeted. He said he’d defeat ISIS and they have been virtually destroyed. He said he’d ban Muslim immigration and despite various attempts by the partisan 9th Circuit, he has prevailed in the Supreme Court where his new appointee, Gorsuch, lives up to the hype. He said he’d declare Jerusalem the capital of Israel, and he did just that. President Trump said the economy would come roaring back and that too is a promise being kept as we witness the nascent stages of a new golden age for our civilization.

Over the past few generations, maybe longer, we’ve stood by and helplessly watched our votes be squandered by two-faced politicians who say one thing on the campaign trail and do the exact opposite once at home in the Beltway. It’s a novelty to have someone in the halls of power who actually does what he says he was going to do. And after only ten short months he’s only now getting warmed up.

After withdrawing our nation from the TPP, President Trump embarked on a whirlwind tour of many Asian nations that would have been party to the deal. He returned to the states triumphant, bringing embarking upon a bevy of new deals in the orient. On the campaign trail then-candidate Trump promised us that the days of multilateral trade deals would be over under his watch, and that he would deal with each nation on a bilateral basis. That’s exactly what he did and it’s working.

President Trump told us that NATO would begin paying their fair share of the burden that for so long has been footed by the United States. I still go back and watch the video of him reading the member state representatives the riot act. I still revel in watching them squirm in their shoes as they received a blistering tongue lashing from a man who says what he means and does what he says. The days of the US subsidizing European security for the price of a song are over. Their party is over because there’s a new sheriff in town, and this sheriff boasts brass balls.

Former President Barack Hussein Obama bragged recently about how the economic progress made lately is the result of his stewardship, but numbers from the Bureau of Labor Statistics tells a much different story. Under BHO’s flailing “leadership,” our country’s unemployment rate decreased. This was sleight of hand, something we can’t be shocked at seeing as how it came from snake oil salesman mentored by Frank Marshall Davis, Saul Alinsky, and Bill Ayers. Unemployment appeared to dip down under Obama because labor force participation was decreasing, that is, people were giving up hope under the supposee hope and change president. They left the labor force and the illusory effect was a decline in unemployment.

Under President Trump, labor force participation is increasing, and unemployment continues to dip down. This is no illusion, no parlor trick in the style of BHO. This is real progress the likes of which progressives promise but never deliver.

Without signing a single piece of “major” legislation, things have improved at our borders and in our marketplace. By simply being there, President Trump has made our country a better place. BHO can kiss our grits. For all his talk about hope and change, he brought nothing of importance or value to our country, with perhaps the exception of destroying his own party. That’s a pretty good Christmas present in and of itself.

I digress.

Here’s the thing: Trump is better than Santa. Santa will plague you with coal and whatnot for refusing to comply with his capricious and arbitrary standards of naughtiness and niceness. Trump loves you no matter what and even those who have trashed him harshly will benefit from the promises he’s kept and will continue to keep. Trump loves you anyway, you ungrateful bastards. I’m not asking you to like him, at the very least I’m asking you to shut up while you enjoy the presents you don’t deserve.

And that’s the thing: deserve has nothing to do with it. President Trump didn’t need to run for office. He amassed for himself a multi-billion dollar fortune and created a beautiful family that loves him unconditionally. Trump didn’t need to run for President, but he did and we’re all benefiting from his victory. He’s bending over backwards for people who hate him. We don’t deserve President Trump. None of us do. And that’s what makes him better than Santa. He loves us whether we’re naughty or nice because we’re Americans, and we all deserve presents under the tree.

Original artwork by jesse comeau

By day, Michael Rodgers is a logistics specialist in the aerospace industry. By night, he is an Associate Editor for the Liberty Conservative. He lives and drinks profusely in Dover, New Hampshire.

1 Comment

  1. Trump is delivering a lump of clean coal that will keep my house warm this winter inexpensively instead of those eyesore windmills that are usually not running because the wind is too fast or nonexistent.
    Oh, and the myriad other things he has accomplished. We’re out of the power dive and slowly gaining altitude.
    Now we just have to primary or otherwise rid ourselves of the RINOs that are blocking him.

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